Join the “Confident Kid 5 day Challenge”

Are you tired of the same old arguments every day?

“Do your homework!” “Clean up after yourself!” “Eat something healthy!” “Dress in something appropriate!” “Get off your phone” “Enough with the video games!”

You want your kids to step up and take responsibility, but they aren’t. 

Your child is struggling in a particular class but won’t ask the teacher for help. You offer your help or outside tutoring but they won’t accept it.

Do you ask them to do chores that never get done?

Are they perfectly capable of walking or riding their bike but insist that you drive them?

Does your child complain about not having friends but doesn’t invite them to do things?

Are you tired of hearing complaints about your cooking but your kid doesn’t make their own lunch, let alone help with dinner?

Does your kid get annoyed that the coach won’t give him more play time, but he refuses to ask about it?

We WANT our kids to make healthy choices, to advocate for themselves, to take initiative and clean up after themselves. We think, “If they would do more, then I could do less.”

The problem is they won’t do more UNTIL WE DO LESS.

Imagine there are 100 units of concern about homework. If you have 90 of them, that only leaves 10 for them to have. We have to let go of our concern before they decide to pick them up.

In the back of their mind, they know….

-You will drive if she bugs you enough.

-When they forget their paper/lunch/book, they know you will go get it.

-Even when you plead with them to eat their vegetables, they know there is ice cream in the freezer.

– Why feel uncomfortable talking to the teacher or coach, when mom can send an email.

We’ve got to reduce our involvement FIRST before they will STEP UP and take charge of their life.

We don’t want to do that because it’s uncomfortable. We don’t want to watch our child to struggle. We want to protect them from physical and emotional discomfort.

Why cause them embarrassment by talking to the teacher when mom can do it quickly and easily?

Why make them work hard when it’s so easy for us to do it?

Because it isn’t THEIR job to manage OUR discomfort.

When we do things for them, they learn that mom is smart, strong and capable. Whey they struggle to solve their own problems and do things for themselves, they learn that THEY are smart, strong and capable.

Our job is to raise adults, not perpetual children who need us.

Is this challenge right for me?

Is it hard for you let your child fail, get a bad grade, or try out for something you know he won’t make?

Do you drive to school to drop off a forgotten assignment or lunch? Or back to school for a forgotten item?

Does schoolwork and homework make up more than 10% of conversations with your child?

Have you ever argued with other adults about how they treat your child?

Is it hard for you to focus on yourself when your kids are in the room?

Do you find yourself getting pulled into friendship or school drama?

Do you want to believe your child is smart and competent but struggle to trust that all will be well?