How do I help my “differently wired” kid make friends

Facebook
Pinterest
Twitter
LinkedIn

Today’s Topic: How Do I Help My “Differently Wired” Kid?

Here to help me answer this question is Debbie Reber, author of Differently Wired: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World

Differently Wired author Debbie Reber

 

Debbie Reber is a parenting activist, New York Times bestselling author, keynote speaker, and the founder of TiLT Parenting, a website, top podcast, and social media community for parents who are raising differently wired children. Her newest book, Differently Wired: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World, came out in June 2018. After living abroad in the Netherlands for the past five years, Debbie, her husband, and 15-year-old son recently moved back to New York City.

 

Words to Ponder on from Debbie Reber, Author of Differently Wired

  • Remember that there is no one right way to be a teenager or have a social life. Check your expectations and don’t compare to yourself at that age or other kids.
  • Play the odds. Try different interest-based camps and classes. They may not go well, but you never know what will click.
  • Focus on the long game.
  • There’s nothing wrong with socializing online.
  • One friend is all they might need.

I took the opportunity to ask Debbie about a few other common scenarios my Supermoms struggle with.

What advice do you have for a mom who is just starting on this journey? Her 5-year-old is getting into trouble in kindergarten and the (private) school is talking about asking him to leave? 

 

Do you have advice for moms whose child got through elementary school but now that in middle school, they are having difficulty. They’ve been diagnosed and have trouble managing the complex workload and now mom feels like she has to sit with them for hours after school to help them focus on homework?

 

 

Supermom Kryptonite:

Thinking that your son’s friendships should look like your own. Not only might there be a brain-centered difference, but there may also be a gender difference.

Boys, as they grow into men, tend to be more project-oriented. They might have one or two friends they get together with for certain activities: online games, working on a project, and that’s enough.

Girls and women can sit around and talk for hours without needing to have something to show for it. Be sure to check your expectations and realize there are many ways to feel socially satisfied and your son’s might be very different than your own.

 

Supermom Power Boost:

Go for a walk, learning and listening to (my suggestion) Debbie’s self care podcast!

Quote of the Day:

“I can predict that life with my differently wired kid will be unpredictable.” Supermom of an adult daughter with autism. 

More to explore

“I don’t have time to relax!” How go, go, go leads to chronic pain

Episode #134 Interview with Betsy Jensen “I don’t have time to relax.”  “I’m exhausted but struggle to fall asleep” “I wake up feeling anxious”  “I try to relax but it doesn’t work.” “If I take a break more work will pile up later.” “I can’t relax because I have too much to do.” If any … Read more…

Embarrassed by my children’s appearance

Episode #133  Embarrassed by my children’s appearance   Question of the Day:  I’m glad this post is anonymous because I’m embarrassed to admit this but I want to get it off my chest and I think you will help me.  I’m embarrassed by my children. I look at moms posting photos on Instagram of their … Read more…

How to connect with a late talking child

Episode #132 – Help facilitate language in your stubborn child, in fun and playful ways.   Question of the Day: From one mom to another I’m out of answers. My 7-year-old was easy – but my 4-year-old son…. no! He’s talking less this year than last year. He ignores me, the dog and his older … Read more…