Is it time for a getaway?

Facebook
Pinterest
Twitter
LinkedIn

How to avoid becoming an exploding doormat

I’m not ready for summer to end. So here I sit, in a redwood grove, listening to birds and nothing else, soaking up one last day with no plans, no agenda, no rushing, no calls, no texts, no shopping, no car pools, aaahhhhhhh. 

My teenagers didn’t want to come camping with me. They are soaking up their last few days of freedom binge watching Grey’s Anatomy and beta testing a new FIFA game (whatever that means). So, for the very first time, I decided to go camping by myself. And you know what? It’s heaven. I am absolutely loving the silence. The chance to be in my happy place and listen to my own thoughts without distractions. I get to hike where I want, when I want, and eat when I feel like eating, without listening to complaints!

But guess what, when I was packing up to go, I could not figure out what foods to pack.

Like, seriously, could not answer the question, “What foods would I like to eat while camping?”

I always think of what my kids will eat. What will my nieces and nephews eat? I am so used to considering everyone else’s preferences before my own, that I could not think about what I want!!!

It’s common for Moms to “lose themselves” through the process of raising children. The first step in my Supermom is Getting Tired coaching programs is reconnecting Moms to their essence. I love helping others rediscover their inner wisdom and reconnect them to the best parts of themselves, I just didn’t know I needed it, too!

I learned a while ago that if I don’t create mental and physical space between me and my family, I quietly build tension, resentment and enter “exploding doormat syndrome”. The exploding doormat syndrome is where you constantly say yes, please others, accommodate everyone but yourself, then finally one day you explode with pent up anger and resentment, often over something small. I don’t do this consciously, it just sneaks out when I’m least expecting it. But when I take time by myself, I’m able to notice what’s missing, and what it feels like to be completely myself.

I decided to go with tomato soup, grilled cheese (with a garnish of fresh, wild clovers.)

This time, I noticed that I could not answer the question, “what foods would I like to eat at the campfire?” I’m so used to thinking about my family and their gluten free/sugar free/dairy free/meat free tendencies, it took me awhile to figure it what I wanted.

Some Moms can be completely themselves, no matter who is around, and I envy them. I have a natural tendency to tune in to others, focusing more on what others want and need than myself. If you find it easy to put your kids’ desires before your own, trying to make them happy so you can relax, then taking time by yourself becomes mandatory. It’s hard to know what you want when other’s voices and opinions are so much louder than your own.

Take a day off, by yourself, to do nothing so you don’t become and “exploding doormat”. Or better yet, a weekend away. You, and your family, deserves a whole and complete version of you. You might not even know what was missing until you get the chance to reconnect with your spirit.

If the thought of being alone with your thoughts scares you, or if you find yourself coming up with excuses of why you can’t do it, it might be time to try life coaching. Save your family from exploding doormat syndrome and schedule a free discovery call at www.LifeCoachingforParents.com/work-with-me

10 Powerful Questions

5 Questions every morning to give you clarity and intention.
5 Questions every evening to give you satisfaction and gratitude.

This is the best way to get you in the driver’s seat of your life.

More to explore

Enneagram Type 5 – The Investigator

The Enneagram Type 5, often referred to as “The Investigator” or “The Observer,” is known for their thirst for knowledge, a desire to understand, and a tendency towards introspection and solitude. These perceptive, cerebral problem solvers are intensely curious and love to delve into topics that interest them. 5’s are lifelong learners and enjoy acquiring … Read more…

Enneagram Type #4 – The Creative Individualist

Enneagram Type 4 Supermoms Enneagram Type 4 personalities are often known as “The Individualist” or “The Romantic.” Sensitive, creative, introspective, and unique, the enneagram type 4 craves authenticity and unique creative expression.  Type 4s possess a rich inner world and often have a unique artistic sensibility. They are drawn to creative pursuits such as writing, … Read more…

Enneagram Type 3 - The Achiever

Enneagram Type 3

Enneagram Type 3 – The Achiever Threes value achievement, results, and recognition and like to do their best. They tend to be ambitious, efficient, highly flexible and adaptable to help them accomplish their goals. Hard working and principled, Three’s can make reliable, devoted parents with the will and energy to be their best. Image-conscious: Maintaining … Read more…